How a Black Eye Changed My Son’s Life and Made Him a Leader

Were you a shy child? Did you want to hide behind others when attention was focused on you? I know what that’s like because I remember those times. I feared being singled out for any reason, much less for a black eye.

My son was like me. He was shy until his black eye.

The Black Eye That Changed Everything

He was about ten at the time. One day, he was playing football in the yard with other boys from the neighborhood. Then, someone’s elbow caught him in the eye. The injury left his eye black and blue, and the discoloration took a few days to clear.

The next day at school, his classmates gathered around him. They all wanted to know what happened. That was when he gave up his years as a shy follower and became a leader.

After the Black Eye, He Chose to Become a Leader

That day, he realized he was significant and could be a leader. As he shed the layers of protection he had taken on while being shy, he became worthy of others’ attention.

However, the black eye accident could have ended differently. He could have acted out, become a bully, or turned mean. Thank God that wasn’t in his character.

His friends looked at him differently because he was different. Now he was a leader, so he signed up to play football at the community recreation center.

The Kids Sought Him Out to Ask His Opinion

Although he was dyslexic, he was doing great. After all the tests, we were told he had trouble visualizing what he read or heard others read or spoke about.

When his teacher first told us they wanted to test him, I went into overdrive. First, I wondered what I had done wrong while pregnant, or while he was growing into the little guy he was now. Next, I spent hours on the phone looking into special schools. This was pre-internet.

Then, one day, I heard him tell his brother about the fish in his small aquarium and their life cycles.

I asked where he learned this information. He said it came from one of the library books he had checked out at the Carnegie Library in town.

That’s When I Stopped Worrying About His Future

Little did I know what was coming. He was in special ed classes until the tenth grade. Then he asked to join the mainstream student body.

That year, he won a county-wide math award. That's pretty impressive for someone who is dyslexic.

It was also the year a science teacher helped turn a teenager's natural doubt about God into a belief that all gods are made up for humans' benefit.

I could not change his mind, so I turned it over to God.

Two Years Later, I Received a Call I Thought Was a Prank

A man called and told me he was from the Navy. He said my son wanted to enlist. I laughed, but he didn’t think it was funny. I said, “Yes, this has got to be a prank.”

He asked, “Mrs. Shaw, why do you believe that?”

I answered that the Navy is for people who want adventure. My son would not even try catsup and mustard on a burger! The recruiter still didn’t laugh, so I asked to speak to my son. Yes, he knew it was for adventure. Still, he felt it offered what he wanted.

So, he signed up for the Navy before high school graduation. There, he would receive training to achieve his goals. In the Navy, he took part in Operation Desert Storm. He was stationed on the battleship U.S.S. Missouri.

Going to War on the Mighty Mo

In the first weeks of 1991, the Missouri prepared to launch Tomahawk Land Attack Missiles. She also made ready to provide gunfire support as required. Then, the ship fired her first Tomahawk missile at Iraqi targets at 01:40 am on January 17, 1991. Twenty-seven additional missiles followed over the next five days. She is equipped with four 12-inch and sixteen 6-inch guns.

The nine 16-inch guns are the Mighty Mo’s trademark feature. Each gun barrel is 68 feet long and weighs an incredible 134 tons. Each one can fire a 2,700-pound projectile 23 nautical miles in 90 seconds — with pinpoint accuracy.

And fire they did. The ship was fired upon, too. A mother’s heart isn’t easy while her child is off during wartime. I also had two nephews with the Army in the desert. They were brothers who had lost their mother to cancer a few years earlier. Because of that, I was grateful my son chose the Navy. It seemed safer.

Yellow Ribbons and Prayers

I put up yellow ribbons everywhere and proudly wore my American Flag with a yellow ribbon attached to it. The prayers would fill a room. I am so glad God gave me a Holy Spirit prayer language. I could pray anywhere, anytime.

My son would call whenever he could. He also wrote nearly illegible letters that I treasure. However, his sense of adventure still didn’t include the food of the Navy. As a result, he lost weight and became sick. He would do his KP, then report to Sick Bay and receive fluids.

Meeting the Girl and Falling in Love

Finally, his ship came to port on the US coast. He came home on leave and met his future wife. He was so thin that his future mother-in-law took her daughter aside. She was afraid he had a disease and was dying.

After he had completed his time in the Navy, he came home and worked the summer in construction with his brother. It didn't take him long to figure out that wouldn't be his future. He could have gone back to the Navy, but he chose the Coast Guard instead.

The Coast Guard

So off he went to training again. Soon after, he got married and was stationed in Miami. At the time, drug smugglers there had a bounty on members of the Coast Guard. His first child was born in Miami. My heart was uneasy the whole time he was stationed there.

Later, when he got a new assignment, his mother-in-law pressured her daughter to bring the baby to stay with her. She told her daughter to let him report by himself. It was hard, but he bid the Coast Guard goodbye.

From a Black Eye to a Successful Business

After several job offers, he decided he could do better on his own. Since then, he has successfully managed his business and full-time sub-contractors for over twenty-five years. Today, he and his family have a condo on the beach. You will find them there most weekends if they aren’t traveling elsewhere.

To say that this mother is proud and pleased is an understatement. Who knew that a black eye could transform someone from a follower into a leader?

Who knew a child with a learning disability could become a successful businessman?

God Often Chooses What We Don’t Expect, Even a Black Eye

I know that a black eye is not a usual path. Still, I am so glad God chose it to bring my son’s character traits to the surface. So the next time you see someone suffering from a black eye, know that God is probably working behind the scenes.

Above all, I know that God has my son, even if my son doesn’t know it at this point.