Using Perception, Perspective, and Listening to Build Deeper Connections

Navigating Perception and Perspective to Change Minds

Have you got people in your circle that you and they agree to disagree?

Have you ever tried to change their perspective, or have they tried to change yours?

Understanding the difference between perception and perspective is crucial in navigating these interactions.

Understanding Perception

Perception is the awareness of the environment through physical sensation. According to Merriam-Webster, it involves what we see, touch, smell, and hear. Our senses form our perceptions. All perception involves signals that travel through the nervous system. The senses are our first impressions of a person, idea, or experience.

Perception is immediate and relies on our senses. However, perception is subjective because it can vary greatly between individuals. Because factors like our past experiences, emotions, and judgment influence how we perceive things. 

Here is an example

Two people witness the same event but perceive it differently. Based on their individual perceptions, one might see a glass half full, and the other sees the glass half empty. 

Understanding Perspective

On the other hand, perspective is the point of view or opinion from which we understand something. Perspective encompasses our beliefs and attitudes and is influenced by our perception. 

The people in our lives shape our perspective as we grow up—parents, teachers, books, and movies all play a role. Our perspectives will change as we take in new information and experiences. 

The Problem with Listening

The problem, as I see it, is that we don’t often observe or listen to others to gain a true perspective. Listening skills are not taught nowadays, and our heads are full of personal, let’s call it, “stuff.” We need to learn how to quiet our minds, that inner chatter, to be present in the moment.

Teaching Observation and Listening

Teaching our children to be great at observing and listening is worth the time and effort.

Here are some ways to impart these valuable skills:

• Nature Activities: Camping and hiking away from electronics help children observe nature. Challenge them to observe birds or squirrels, how they hunt for food, and where their habitats are. Drawing pictures or using a camera would be a good way to capture them.  
• Meaningful Conversations: Discussing their interests shows that you value their opinions. Being involved with their sports or hobbies.
• Engagement and Debate: Encouraging debates helps develop critical thinking and listening skills. Also, it trains children in the art of persuasion. Learn these skills by studying debating techniques. And reading books like “Thank You for Arguing” by Jay Heinrichs.
• Modeling Behavior: Demonstrating good listening by giving others your full attention. Be in the moment!

How might we change someone’s perspective — 

By convincingly conveying our ideas and values to others.

First, you need to observe the person.

Do you know enough to pick up on their characteristics?

What do you know of their past experiences?

What experience has given you this perspective of them and their life?

Here is an example:

Say I have someone in my circle who would benefit from inner or emotional healing.

1. I know this because I have observed this person getting upset or know they have a history of abuse.
2. The method of healing I practice is easy and practical. It takes less time than many other methods and has been life-changing for many.
3. This person has been closed off when I tried to help in the past. How do I convey the information to this person without upsetting them?
4. I will tell her my story of survival, healing, and how I became joyful.
5. First, as a Christian, I pray that she will listen. 
6. I need her full attention, so I pray for alone time without interruptions. Above all, I put the outcome in Jesus’ hands.

Sharing personal stories can be powerful. Here is a short version of my story:

I was born into a middle-class home in the late forties. Raised by alcoholic parents, with my mother openly rejecting me. Anger and bitterness consumed me. Until, in my mid-twenties, when I was introduced to the Holy Spirit.

Anger is an ingredient that never does what you want it to. —

Baked With a Kiss/UP TV Show

Then, He, the Holy Spirit, began to walk me through my emotional healing.

Along the way, I learned two of the biggest lessons:

1. Forgiveness lets you move forward

Forgiveness unlocks the knots of anger and bitterness that hold you back and keeps you stuck.

2. Walking a mile in the other person’s shoes can change you

My rejection, and maybe yours, could be healed by walking a mile in the other person’s shoes. It’s how we gain empathy for that person. 

A few years ago, with the Holy Spirit’s urging. I took what I knew of my mother’s life during the time frame when she was expecting me and wrote it all down. Then I added her age when all these things took place.

Next, I thought about what she must have been going through. I put myself in her place as she delivered me and her pronouncement to put distance between us.

That’s when my perspective changed

By walking in my mother’s shoes and understanding her struggles, I found it easy to forgive her. My lifelong rejection was gone.

Then, I joined an online group and had my first Immanuel Approach group inner healing session. Since then, I have had many private sessions, which added to the joy and peace I had already been able to claim.

Now, I share my story to help others find healing. Peace and joy are on the other side of the pain. I pray for a change in their perspective.

Conclusion

Understanding the differences between perception and perspective is essential for personal growth and valuable for effective communication. While our immediate sensory experiences shape perception, our perspective is influenced by our learning and life experiences.

Teaching children to observe and listen can cultivate critical thinking and empathy, skills that prepare them for a future shaped by human interaction and even advancements like AI.

Sharing personal stories can change others’ perspectives and foster deeper connections. Improving our listening skills and having an open mind can strengthen our lives and those of future generations.