For the children I raised
We have six children between us, but I only raised three. Hold on as I explain and tell you how we celebrated each of their 40th birthdays.
My oldest son I gave up for adoption in 1968, so I didn’t raise him. God reunited us in 2007, and his wife gave me the idea of providing the party months before the big day. She had arranged his party; I believe it was in March, before his June birthday.
You see 1970, I married a man from a different state, and we relocated several times. After fourteen years and two sons, my marriage came to an end. That’s when I decided to move back to North Georgia, where I grew up. It was good to get away from people’s questions and strange looks.
After a while, I met this man with three daughters. He was so much fun, witty and charming, and always a gentleman — the polar opposite of my ex-husband. His first two daughters were from his first marriage, and his ex-wife raised those two.
I saw the youngest daughter as a gift from God. She was from his second marriage, and her mother gave him custody. She turned three years old right after our wedding. I had wanted a girl, but it wouldn’t be until God put us together. I could not love her anymore if she were my natural child.
1994 with our four older children grown, we moved to a farmhouse in the country. We created a family “hall of fame” by framing the kids’ awards by hanging them in the wide hallway.
As the children became adults, there were weddings and grandchildren to celebrate.
Then it became time to start planning the first surprise party for the first of the three I raised.
So, we painted a tree blue, hung streamers from it, and invited people to help us celebrate our son’s 40th!
This son chose to join the Navy and served on the U.S.S. Missouri, a battleship. During The Gulf War or Desert Storm, he saw enough action for this Mama’s heart. When his Navy days ended, he came home for the summer and worked in construction with his brother. He married, joined the Coast Guard, and was stationed in Miami. Then after his first child was born, he decided to change careers. He is an entrepreneur with a very successful small business.
His birthday is in December, but we opted for a late summer day, and it was so much fun. He was so surprised, and a perfect day to celebrate him.
Years ago, I had read about a man in New York who was throwing an outdoor party and had a dead cherry tree. He could not have it removed before the party, so he painted it. Well, we had an apple tree die, so we painted it.
This son’s party mainly consisted of our extended family. I invited his father and his girlfriend. My son had not spoken to him or seen him in several years. And my ex had not seen his grandchildren in all that time. It was good to reunite them. The menu was southern fried chicken with all the good things he loves: homemade biscuits, masked potatoes, crowder peas, and brown gravy.
We present each child with a treasure chest. And it’s an exciting few minutes as they explore everything I’ve saved from their childhood. Those drawings, finger paintings that used to be refrigerator art. Some had pots for plants or cans made into pencil holders. Of course, there are report cards, along with the cards and pictures given to me—even some unique tee shirts. The boys had glow-in-the-dark peanut, “Carter for President” tee shirts. This son also had a 29N Club tee shirt for crossing the equator while in the Navy. Their baby books are included as well.
Two weeks after the party, the blue tree fell. I had it moved and erected among my herb beds for the loofah sponge gourds to climb and grow. It was soon home to a pair of birds that found a hole in the tree an ideal place to live. We enjoyed the color it brought to the garden for several years.
The second surprise party was much larger as five generations came together to celebrate. We had nine overnight guests from my ex’s family. It was a celebration for the record books.
We served low country boil. Some of our guests had never enjoyed it, and I cooked French toast for breakfast the following day. I received such a lovely email from this son thanking me that I count it among my treasures.
We celebrated him for having the ability to help us all when we had any construction going on, as he is a master carpenter, a great artist, and a dreamer. Certainly, he has made many of our dreams come true. He has helped us remodel our farmhouse, reclaiming it from the days of a sunken heart-shaped tub. Remodeling the front porch. Then he framed his brother’s new house. He built a gazebo for a wedding for one of his step-sisters. He has touched every building on the property and helped keep us in this 100+-year-old farmhouse.
Among the treasures in his chest was a letter from Ford Motor Company. They acknowledged his artistic ability when he was about ten. His baby book was interesting, according to his sister-in-law. As she read it while expecting her second child, she wanted an exciting child like him. As they say, be careful what you ask for. Fast forward a few years, and I received a photo of an electrical plug with a scorched area surrounding it. She had an exciting child, and I am happy he is now an adult.
Well, we gave the youngest child her surprise party this past Saturday. We are awaiting the birth of her second grandchild; it will be our fifth great-grandson, no girls yet. I was a little afraid she might be called to the hospital before we could get her party in the books.
It was a Mexican theme, her favorite food, with her friends doing all the decorations. I took care of the food. One of those friends flew in from Flordia on Friday evening and was forced to wait until the party to see her.
We filled the deck with tables and chairs, but with a heat index of at least 100 degrees, no one wanted to sit there. There was enough shade with our large pecan trees, and we had many outdoor fans going. Everyone seems to have enjoyed themselves despite the heat. She says she had no idea a party was afoot.
She was awarded her treasure chest. Her chest was even more special because her biological mother had saved some items. The bow from the mailbox when she came home from the hospital. There were many drawings, cards, her baby spoon, a hair brush, a sippy cup, and colorful decorations. She remarked, as a little girl, that she always drew pictures in church on whatever paper she could find.
Then she also received her grandmother’s old typewriter.
We celebrate her heart to care for others and try to improve those lives she touches. Always kind and generous, she makes friends wherever she goes. As a mother of four, she became an unexpected grandmother at thirty-six, a role she loves. You can count on her to show up and help out no matter what needs to be done.
Of course, there was a pinata, and that was so much fun as her son and a friend hung it from one of the large pecan trees. The rope was left loose for a bit of tomfoolery to happen. And her husband pulled the pinata high in the air. When she finally banged it open, “airplane” bottles of her favorite drink came out. It was so much fun to watch. Of course, there was a photo booth where many insisted on taking selfies. The decorations were over the top. These ladies brought their A-game for my daughter’s party.
Oh, those last two children should have figured it would happen. But they both seemed genuinely surprised.
I hope I have given you some fun ways to celebrate your children and return to them many memories of their childhood days.
